today I walked past a basketball court and saw two little kiddies playing, one small and one more round the edges.
apparently the chubbier one could'nt catch the ball and started yelling indignantly 'CB KNN!' or whatever other curse words I presume follow after I left.
(ROLLS EYES 360DEGREES AROUND)
I mean what are they, 8, 9 years old?!?!
whats with all the vulgarities!!
I just hate the way it sounds (WHICH IS NOT COOL AT ALL PLS GROW UP), all the 'knnbcjb' or 'mother (insert anything unpleasant)' UGHHH
haha anyway! I spent my birthday working. it was kinda depressing but the second day of work wasnt bad. :) Its a Timbre Rock&Roots 2days event and entrance fee is like 178bucks I think?!? Crazy right, I see lottttsa of ang mohs there.. like 90% of the entire crowd. hahaha I was basically doing nothing on the first day (sounds good being paid like that but it was way too boring I wanted to cry) and was a cashier for the first time on the second day! Cashiering is fun, and it was better at an event like this where you can hear bands after bands perform live and eat free food and ice-cream.... hahaha if only that was my full-time job!
jo shan fio came to surprise me at 12midnight with their homemade cake!! hehehehe happy~ had fun recording crazy videos and taking unglam pics too in my room toooo WHERE ARE MY PRESENTS????????????????????? (HAHAHA) no lah, thanks babes<3 :)
actually I was bothered about some things because I realise whatever I did for friendships wasnt reciprocated. was hurt to a certain extent and because I like to keep things within me the feeling didnt go away. I treasure whatsbetweenus alot, but I dont think being in denial and smiling happily all the time is gonna heal those wounds. sometimes i blame myself for being such a pushover
bytheway, jam/xiao jing teng's concert was simply marvellous!!!!! many times I had to smile at the incredulity of hearing his voice LIVE. it was just so.good.
S.H.E is coming 18th April!!!! sighs no moolah cannot go. LALA if you are reading this, WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO???!!! :(
P.S. thanks to all who wished me! :)
Feel the Beat
Friday, March 12, 2010 12:08 AM
hahaha finally! I can catch him singing LIVE tmr night!
really excited, cant.wait!!!!!
I still remember the first ever concert I've been to, and it left me kind of floating (not being dramatic) when it ended.
haha I was walking out of course but at the same time it seemed to me like I'm floating, totally in some sort of ecstasy. my mind's in whirls and stomach have butterflies. I think I was still in Sec 1 or 2 then.
I like theatre performances and concerts. Some think watching a concert dvd is enough but the atmosphere, the effects, the lightings, the whole performance, is so different from just sitting there watching the television screen.
your body tensing up before the performance starts, screaming like a deranged baboon (HAHA) when he/she whose songs got you through good/bad times appears, singing along and swaying to the music, all the way thinking how close you are to this normal human being who just happens to have an amazing voice and captivating presence enough to make you idolise and worship like a silly fan.... It is actually kinda surreal
hahaha
its gonna be a long day tommorrow so imma try to get some sleep.
I think I know why I'm feeling like this now (hard to explain except that its a vry SIAN feeling) but I'm gonna do my best to ignore it like how I always do and hope it goes away soon.
okaaay
Sunday, March 07, 2010 12:09 AM
so thats it, the big hoo-ha is finally overrrrrrr
i dont really know what to say, i'm not pleased but not terribly upset either initially thought I would cry no matter what but alas! the tears didnt come haha
shared ben&jerrys double brownie with three icecream toppings with jo and shine after getting the results damn piggy i know! but food therapy always works, albeit momentarily.. hahaha
btw I am going to XJT's concert!!!!!!!!!!!! his voice is omg seriously amazing cant.wait. :D
stupid lala go ns liao, cannot talk bout teletubbies and baby sun and yellow balls anymore :( hahaha
oh I watched Alice in Wonderland all rae deeeee haha it wasnt omgfreakingawesome but it was great nevertheless! love the characters and the colours and the effects, plus mad hatter/johhnydepp is mad cute! not as psychotic as I imagined, despite the crazy make-up and all. same for the snow queen/annehathaway.. But the Red Queen is really funny! 'Off with his head!'
decisions decisions decisions URGH
Monday, March 01, 2010 10:14 PM
you dont know how scared I am.
Of it all.
of the person who fakes everything and tries to be everyone's friend
of the fear and hurt of falling into something deeper just to find out its a fluke
of the tears of joy or sadness on friday
of the cold still air that seperates us
of the decisions I have to make in the future
of everything
I dont know how long I can keep this up, really
hello, may I speak to....
12:37 PM
Been soo busy with work
from making 70+ calls a day and booking 0 appointments to making 200+ calls and 5 (depends on luck) appointments! the thing I learnt most in this line, hard work dont pay off. I can sit there and call all I want (and get rejected countless times) but might only get 1, 2 appointments a day? shitass borrrrring~ hahaha and I think I know all the diff types of waiting dialtones people have already some are seriously damn childish (one kept going 'yeah yeah~ oooh oooh~ which is quite sick HAHA), and some are quite rockin' baby! haha almost didnt want them to pick up the call anyway rude clients are a sure thing, and I can more or less deal with it (although some f words are tempting to say to them) haha sometimes I get so tired I kinda nod off while the 'ring ring' goes off in my ears and I wake up only when I hear a Hello? by which I then smoothly and steadily read out my lines! HAHA i am the pro ! anyway im glad I dont have to do this alone and friends like fio and shan are with me or else I think I wld have slammed down the phone spewing vulgarities and walked out long ago. hahaah and I made new friends tooo we went with ralph/lppl/willie's lookalike to catch Percy Jackson and The Lightning Thief tgt! the movie was abit kiddy for me but ovarall was not bad ;) yes the dude's cute but thats all haha at one point i even started to doze off not cause the show's boring but I was just too tired. made prank calls to people! so fun HAHA best part of the day (and also lunch cause we can slack!!) wanted to do more next week but no work liaoo, not like I think I'll be in the mood to after friday~
sighs yes freaking out, cant believe the day IS actually gonna be here, I still wna think of it as far far away and indulge myself in this whole web of oblivion I weaved since school ended. urghhh btw the sch librarian called me the second time today to remind me of the 'outstanding fines' I have. guess how much? ONE FREAKING DOLLAR SERIOUSLY?
i now have bangs! time for a change
wonder how many things will change at the end of this week.
WELCOME:)
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felicia Nineteen
aries
marchtwentysix91
kuo chuan presbyterian/ex-agapian
zhonghua sec/2e2'05/4e5'07
innova jc-0811D
ex-cldds slacker
ex-new media arts geek.
Lovesss music, drama, hanging out with my crazy friends, my family, and good food! (:
S.H.E (cheena at heart), Jam xiao jing teng, joe cheng, johnnydepp, ed westwick, jo kwon (2am), taemin (ShiNee), nichkhun (2pm). Ga-In (BEG)
in total randomness, i like stitch too HAHA
and yes of course, Michael Jackson <3
PO TAY TO, PO TAH TO
RAH RAH SIS BOOM BAH
BYE!
tagboard
you are not alone
I love him all the same
saturday, july 18th, 2009.
Michael Jackson, King of Pop
If I were to write this post one week ago I wouldn't have got past the first few lines, without crying so badly.
Admittedly, the news of his passing did not bothered, much less saddened me because my impression of him was vague and as a child I wasn;t exposed to any of this songs or videos, just news from the press every now and then. Till a few days after his death. I went on Youtube and before I knew it I was clicking videos after videos, watching and in awe of this man who not only served to entertain, but strived to serve the community with his enormous heart. And as I watched on and knew more, so much more about what he've been through his life, emotions started pouring in. And when I least expected it, tears started to come. I was never his fan, but now I regret not being one. It is not just one of those idol craze or whatever no, it was true sincere admiration for his works and humanitarianism that touched me, that made me look upon him as a role model.
Its hard to believe that since the media had portrayed him as some wacko freak, paedophile, child molester..etc. but may I say, BULLSHIT. he is none of that sort. Other than being the greatest entertainer of the time and coming up with the most original dance moves that many stars tried hard (but pale in comparison in my opinion) to imitate, Micheal Jackson shares the love he has, especially to children, to people around him. He was a philanthropist, donating millions of dollars to the record 39 charities he supported, and raising more through his own Heal the World Foundation. He built NeverLand Ranch, complete with amusement parks, fun rides, a place where children dreamed of going for fun and laughter. From young, Michael Jackson had a childhood very different from others, where had to perform at a very young age. When he made mistakes, his father used to beat him, and not only with a belt.
To make up for his lost childhood, Michael had always adored children and he himself is somehow like a child trapped in an adult body (watch his documentary, ignore the stupid bastard interviewer who was plain bias and selfish to see that such a nature still exists in a man so great he just had to bring him down. shall not waste time elaborating on this backstabbing ass because he's simply not worth it. If you're interested, watch the documentary Living with Michael Jackson on youtube. I could'nt get past to the last few parts because I got so fed up with his narrow-mindedness and ignorance that I closed the window). So back to the point. Michael Jackson brought orphans to NeverLand, where they play freely in the theme parks and find joy and laughter, which he himself derive more than anyone else' from the happy looks on their faces. Children were invited for sleepovers at his place, because it was safe, secure. But when news of him being a child paedophile arose after being charged by one of the kids who slept in his room, he ended up paying millions of dollars aside from being publicly humiliated and disgraced. because he did nothing disgraceful of that sort. because a few years later the kid owned up that it was his parents who made him to do, succumbed to the temptation of money, something which Micheal Jackson do not lacked. The father was tape-recorded discussing his intention to pursue charges, where he said, "If I go through with this, I win big-time. There's no way I lose. I will get everything I want and they will be destroyed forever ... Michael's career will be over". It was painful. Yet Michael still persisted, years later, in bringing less fortunate children to NeverLand, because that was more important to him. Even though the pain and hurt he had gone through had probably never healed. His strength is one of the reasons why I admire him so much.
Then there was another incident, this time of him 'dangling' his baby over the window. 'omg he's crazy he wants to throw the baby down!!!!' maybe that's what it seemed like on tv and on papers, but what they didn't show is the crowd of fans below the hotel he's staying, yelling his name and wanting to also see his baby. So Michael showed them his baby, his hands wrapped under his baby's arms so tight and pulled him back as fast as he could. But what did the viewers see? A slowed-down version of him apparently dangling his baby in mid-air like a bad father. Its ignorance if people believed he was going to actually throw his own baby down the building. And at that time, I was one of the ignorant ones. I remembered looking at the pictures on some gossip magazine and felt slightly freaked out. But now I realise how much he loved his children, and how hard he tried to protect them from the media. And again, all these negative press and biasness probably was too overwhelming....how much pain can a person take? we would never know because we're not him, its hard to understand. But maybe all these people will leave him alone now, since he's already gone.
I bought The Essential Michael Jackson cd, a compilation of hit songs by him. My dad and I watched his concerts and performances and music videos and we were more than in awe, in fact I think thats an understatement. Newfound respect and admiration for the man who was so creative and original, who dared to do things not commonly seen, creating dance steps while he sang at those times when most singers just stood there and sung. He thought of challenging and exciting music videos where people had never seen the injection of extra footage to create a kind of story. And not to mention those crazy vocals, coordinated dance moves, the famous moonwalk (I never get tired of it) and this amazing 45degree tilt he does which simply blows my mind away. It was all his signature style, the gloves, the crotch-grabbing whatever. Every single performance was done in class and so much more. He was an inspiration to people over the world, different races, and especially to African-Americans. He was an icon and also their pride.
I can rattle on and on because there's too many things about him that are truly inspiring and simply awesome but sometimes words just cant fully express it. And yes maybe I do seem a little bias but this is what I truly feel. My only regret is that I have and will never get the chance to attend one of his mind-blowing concerts and be one of those lucky fans who felt the presence of Michael Jackson, the most successful entertainer of all time, the King Of Pop.
'Smile, even though your heart is aching.'
This is one of the lyrics from his favourite song 'Smile', written by Charlie Chaplin and was sung during his memorial.
I remembered someone said something like this during the memorial, 'Even though we need him here, but I guess God needed him more'. Even though we miss him so much, Heaven is probably the place he needs to be, away from any pain, suffering or cruelty. (rhymes!) He has already achieved so much and left behind a wonderful legecy that will pass down to generations after generations.
Thank you Michael.
